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Tuesday 28 January 2014

Divorce Survival Guide-- The Key To Overcoming A Painful Divorce

However, it almost never works that way, as is evidenced by the fact that the typical divorce recovery time takes between three and six years. The culprit is the huge ball of emotional reactions triggered by your divorce that resides in your gut and mucks up your life decisions as we try to adjust to life as a single person after years of marriage.
The issues that prevent a rapid adjustment to life after divorce are emotion-based and, as such, cannot be solved logically. All we can do is dissolve the disruptive energy they cause. For example, you got divorced and it's painful. You cannot "solve" the problem of divorce because, regardless of what you do, you are still divorced.
The pain is the problem. It is emotion-based. Providing reasons why you shouldn't feel that way only makes matters worse. However, we can "dissolve" away the pain by disclosing and discussing it with a trusted person. I call this person a "Transition Partner" or "TP."
If you hold the emotional reactions in, they fester and grow. If you disclose them to a well-meaning, but unhelpful, friend, they gather energy and grow even more. You must find a person who can be truly helpful in reducing the damaging impact of your emotional reactions to your divorce and subsequent life after divorce. 

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